Free Indeed

Here’s a little tune I’ve been working on.  I don’t know if I’m done with it yet.  Maybe I’ll add a bridge or something.  I definitely don’t have an ending yet.  If you even sorta like it, share it on Facebook because I’m taking an FB hiatus.  I still have my account, I’m just not getting on there.

Thanks!!!!

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Broken Bones

I missed church again this morning.  My poor children have had the worst experiences with allergies this summer.  Not to be too crass but I’ve decided to dub this the “Summer of Puke”.  It’s been… BAD.  So. Bad.  So I took my eldest to Urgent Care because she was amazingly sick this morning.  She is doing much better now but I still missed church again.

That being said, I did get to hear all about church later from my husband, Nick.  I definitely missed out on some good stuff this morning.  Nick posted this pic from the service on FB with the caption: “We’re all dancing on broken bones.”

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He was quoting Bob Bretsch, who was quoting Psalm 51:8 – “Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.”

Psalm 51 is a well-known and much quoted psalm.  It’s beautiful and inspiring and if you haven’t read it lately, go take the time.

Anyway, as I went about my day, I just couldn’t get those words out of my mind, “We’re all dancing on broken bones.”  For some reason I identify with them so much.  Maybe because I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the battles we are all waging inwardly.  Thinking how many of us are engaged in a war we don’t even know about.

And so with spiritual violence on my mind, Psalm 51 in my hand, and those poignant words on my lips, I sat down at the piano and wrote a new song.  The song is called “Broken Bones”.  (Per usual, I quickly recorded it with my phone sooooo… that explains the quality of the recording.  You’re welcome?)

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Truth time and I’m Still Here

Truth time:  I’ve written over 50 songs in the last few years.  I’m not really sure how many.  I don’t post many of them on here for one simple reason: time.  I’m a mom with a full schedule, it’s difficult to find the time to get a semi-decent take to post on here.

More truth:  My husband has a very nice recording studio that I could utilize whenever I want.  But I have even less time for that.

But I want to make more time for recording.  And I want to make some actual good recordings.

I’m working on it, guys.  Give me a break.  😉

Anyway, until I get around to making decent recordings, I’m gonna try to make more time to post my semi-decent iPhone recordings.  At least you’ll get to hear those gems.

So here’s another one for you.

I’m Still Here.

But first, the backstory:

Some of you know that my mom passed away April 3, 2016 after a two year battle with cancer.  I wrote this song at a time when I was trying to make sense of it all.  I had been reading Wild by Cheryl Strayed (and watching the movie that was based off of the book) around the time I wrote this.  Cheryl’s mother also died of cancer and her story is heartbreaking.

CherylStrayed_book_PCTAnyway, there’s this scene in the movie when Cheryl has this realization.  She’s been hiking the PCT for a while (Pacific Crest Trail) and she’s still hiking even though other, more experienced hikers have quit the trail due to adverse weather conditions.  And she says, “Wow.  Greg quit and I’m still here.”  And something inside me just broke.  It’s my favorite scene in the whole movie.

(The book and movie are not for children, just FYI.  There are definitely some “fast-forward” scenes, as I like to call them.  I’m not ashamed to admit that even though I’m 36, when a sex scene shows up in a movie I cover my eyes and make Nick fast-forward.  Don’t judge me.  You don’t know my story. 😉 )

Anyway, that’s where the words “I’m still here” come from.  It’s this realization that even though we’ve been battered, bruised and beaten by the storms of life, we survived.  We’re still alive and here and ready to take on the next day’s challenges.  And even though it hurt a lot, we’re going to be ok.

So, without further ado, here’s the song:

I'm Still Here lyrics

 

If We Knew

Here’s another little diddy for you by yours truly.  Nick and I have been listening to sermons by Brennan Manning lately and they’ve made me realize just how much we don’t understand the love of God.  Hope you enjoy the song.

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For Sure

Mark 2:17

When Jesus heard this, he said to them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick; I have come to call not the righteous but sinners.”

 

The only requirement to become a follower of Christ, is to be broken and to admit it.

 

Here’s a new song written by me, performed on my old acoustic piano, and recorded on my iphone.  So, obviously, the crème de la crème.

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Broken by the love of God

Today I am utterly broken by the love of God. I’m in grief over the ones who scorn him.  I’m aching to love him and aching for those I love to love him as well. 

God, I pray you open the eyes of our heart as Paul prayed in Ephesians 1:17. I long to see you and I long for those whom I love to see you. Thank you for your grace and mercy. I thank you that you love us as we are and not as we should be. 

I leave you, beloved, with this: A song and 5 quotes by Rich Mullins. Enjoy. 

Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in your beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken.

Never forget what Jesus did for you. Never take lightly what it cost Him. And never assume that if it cost Him His very life, that it won’t also cost you yours.

I grew up hearing everyone tell me ‘God loves you’. I would say big deal, God loves everybody. That don’t make me special! That just proves that God ain’t got no taste. And, I don’t think He does. Thank God! Because He takes the junk of our lives and makes the most beautiful art.

I take comfort in knowing that it was the shepherds to whom the angels appeared when they announced Christ’s birth. Invariably throughout the course of history, God has appeared to people on the fringes. It’s nice to find theological justification for your quirks.

I look back over the events of my life and see the hands that carried Moses to his grave lifting me out of mine. In remembering I go back to these places where God met me and I meet him again and I lay my head on his breast, and he shows me the land beyond the Jordan and I suck into my lungs the fragrance of his breath, the power of his presence.

Brother’s Keeper

Digging this song today.  We watched Ragamuffin again recently and I gotta say that movie always messes with me.  And then I listen to Rich Mullins obsessively for days.  So enjoy the song.  Lyrics below.  Check out the movie.  It’s a tear-jerker.

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Now the plumber’s got a drip in his spigot
The mechanic’s got a clank in his car
And the preacher’s thinking thoughts that are wicked
And the lover’s got a lonely heart
My friends ain’t the way I wish they were
They are just the way they are

And I will be my brother’s keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won’t despise him for his weakness
I won’t regard him for his strength
I won’t take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will, I will be my brother’s keeper

Now this roof has got a few missing shingles
But at least we got ourselves a roof
And they say that she’s a fallen angel
I wonder if she recalls when she last flew
There’s no point in pointing fingers
Unless you’re pointing to the truth

And I will be my brother’s keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won’t despise him for his weakness
I won’t regard him for his strength
I won’t take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will, I will be my brother’s keeper

I will be my brother’s keeper
Not the one who judges him
I won’t despise him for his weakness
I won’t regard him for his strength
I won’t take away his freedom
I will help him learn to stand
And I will, I will be my brother’s keeper