Hey folks! You may not know this, but I don’t just write about my feelings and fears on COVID-19… I SING ABOUT THEM!
But… if you’ve followed this blog for any length of time, you were probably expecting this.
I got up this morning fresh with fear and panic. So I decided to stop looking at COVID-19 updates for a while. I set an alarm and I’m not allowed to look at any updates until then. But I still couldn’t get my mind off of it, so I sat down at the piano and tried to sing all my feelings out.
Here’s what came out. I called it Be Here. The piano is a little loud on the recording but that’s ok. It drowns out my vocal mistakes. Love you all. Hope you like it.
Here’s a new song for you. I know it’s been a while. It’s called Cold Ones. It could be about vampires or it could be about trying to accomplish what we think of as the “rules” with our own strength. It could be about the people who indoctrinated others with their own sense of self-loathing and sense of right and wrong out of fear. Fear of hell, fear of death, fear of a judging and vengeful God. It could be about those who recognize the reality of sin and darkness and choose to fight against it with their own armor instead of nestling themselves into the arms of God and letting God protect them.
I wrote this song mostly because I’ve been thinking about 1 Corinthians 15:56 a lot lately.
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.
Sting here means weapon like a bee stinger. So the weapon of death is sin. And sin gets its power from the law. But Jesus fulfilled the law for us. So sin has no power anymore. So death no longer has a weapon against us.
When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. But he placed his right hand on me, saying, “Do not be afraid; I am the first and the last, and the living one. I was dead, and see, I am alive forever and ever; and I have the keys of Death and of Hades.
“Death has been swallowed up in victory.” “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?”
The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
1 Corinthians 15:55-57
Jesus defeated death. We can stop focusing on sin now and stop trying to save ourselves, buy our own salvation. We can focus on Jesus. We can just enjoy him and our relationship with him. He has forgiven our debt. We don’t have to try and keep paying it back. It doesn’t exist anymore. The debt has been erased. Forever.
I don’t want to be a “cold one” any longer, someone trying to warm themselves with their own strength. And I don’t want to teach my children to do that either. Or have them believe they must behave a certain way to be loved by God. I want to shed my “protective” overcoat and receive my warmth from the loving arms of God, not from my own abilities and behaviors.
Did you know it’s totally ok to love yourself? It’s in the bible, “Love thyself” 1Bonnie 1:1. Ok, that might be in the apocrypha.
Anyway, I wrote a song about loving myself and not letting the world use me as a punching bag.
No weapon that is fashioned against you shall prosper, and you shall confute every tongue that rises against you in judgment. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord and their vindication from me, says the Lord.
Hopefully, you will see the wisdom in this and listen to the song and then tell all your friends about it. (Share it on Social Media and the Social Media Fairy will bring you a golden basket of unicorn kisses! So don’t forget to Like, Comment and Share!)
Nick and I have talked about doing a little show at our house for a while. And right now, I’m working up a set list of my original songs.
I have over 50 at least right now. (I haven’t counted for a long time.) And I’m definitely not playing all 50+. So if you have a favorite one of my originals (not covers) let me know and I’ll see if I can add it to the set.
Check out some of my songs here. Obvi, not all my songs are there, and tbh, most of the recordings are terribly made on my iphone. But whatcha gonna do?! I’m not a professional musician, I’m a professional mom!
Anyway, drop me a line, text me, FB, IG, carrier pigeon, something. I’ll let you know when we have a date set. Woot. Now, feed me input.
*For those who don’t know, that is not Wall-E pictured above. That is Johnny 5, who is very much alive, bozo.
Working on a new song this evening. Fun times. The song is below. But, first, I have a question for you: who would come to my house if I did a show and played some of my songs? I have a lot of songs and most of them no one but my family has heard. I’d really like a play them for people some time. So I guess I’m just curious, would anyone come? Drop me a line if you’d like to come to my house and hear some of my songs.
Been feeling pretty down. Let’s not go into why. But if there is anything that cheers me up when I’m a mess of emotions (and I use “cheers me up” in the loosest of senses), it’s dwelling on the knowledge that I am not an accident. God made me on purpose. He desired for a Bonnie to be in this world.
This is super important to me because I often feel like there aren’t many who desire for a Bonnie to be in this world. Not that they DON’T want me, more that they are indifferent to the idea. “How do you feel about having a Bonnie in this world?” *shrugs* “Meh.”
So all day long I have been reminding myself that God DOES want me in this world. “How do you feel about having a Bonnie in this world?” *super happy anime face* “That would be AWESOME!” *”awesome” echoes throughout the known universe*
He made me on purpose and he made you on purpose too. Dwell in that.
This recording was made using Nick’s new gadget. Still working out the kinks, as in this is the first time we used it. But the recording sounds better than the ones I usually get with my phone. This is also not super polished because I did one take and said, “That’s good enough.” Also, there is a bit of dead space at the beginning. Just go with it.