Ok. I will be the first to admit this song is really depressing. Lol. But I am only mildly depressed. I reconciled within myself a long time ago that I wasn’t on people’s radar. But that’s just the nature of everyone being their own main character. I just had a hard day and couldn’t think of anyone who would really be concerned about it with me. I tried. I reached out to a few people but then just gave up. It’s Tuesday. Lol. And my hard day wasn’t even really about me. But I felt shitty when I left work and just wanted someone to talk to and there was no one. Some of that is on me. I have become a lot more closed off than I used to be. Anyway, my little emo attitude is temporary. I bounce back harder than a dick on blue pills. Yes, feeling emo at the moment. But gimme a few and I’ll feel like the queen I am again.

Little goblins are running through my head
They want me dead they want me dead
To erase the very thought of me
So they can be free they can be free

They whisper nothing really matters
And no one cares at all
And no one wants to hear you sing another stupid song
And no one is listening to anything you say
Quiet little one while we steal your life away

Everything is rotten to the core
And I don’t want to cry anymore

Little goblins are running through my head
They’ve all be fed they’ve all been fed
Still they hunger for what I cannot give
I want to live I want to live

They whisper nothing really matters
And no one knows you’re here
And no one would even notice if you suddenly disappeared
And all the ones you have loved have moved on with their lives
And no one would even notice if you died

Everything is rotten to the core
And I don’t want to cry anymore

Maybe if I’d been a better whore
Said yes and please and thank you I’ll take more
And I can always give until I’m poor

I don’t want to cry anymore

I have been a writing machine lately. Boop.

I told it to the bees
I told it to the trees
All about the ways
You make me feel inside
(Wanna run and hide)

How you make me scream
Pulled apart at the seams
Broken and in pain
Happy but insane
(Who am I to complain)

There is water running down these walls
Flooding every corner of these halls
There are flowers growing on these graves
And on the off chance you love me I’ll stay

But I don’t wanna stay
I just wanna hear you say
Every secret you never told me
That you always thought I knew
And I don’t wanna go
I just want you to know
There is so much I never told you
And now I never will
I don’t wanna stay but I don’t wanna go

Not a new song. A really old one. I just like it. I haven’t played it in a long time and to be honest I didn’t really practice much before I recorded her. So there.

You took a long time getting here
But now you’re here with me
Now I see you were always with me
I was numb thinking you were gone

I packed you up in an old shoebox
Thought I had to bury you
I believed I could not survive
Not be safe not be whole

But I was wrong to leave you behind
To pack you away
To break up my heart into pieces like the day
To break up the sky
The sun moon and stars
You can’t live without the night
You can’t live without your scars
Without your scars

Welcome Home Maggie Parker

Don’t read too much into the lyrics. I just enjoy writing sad music. People always assume they know what I’m writing about and a lot of times it’s just an amalgamation of stuff I think about and nothing specific.

I miss the sound of your voice
But not everything you said
I miss the way you walked
But not how you walked away
I know I won’t regret everything we had
But I hope and pray to forget someday

Cuz I don’t want to feel this way forever

Got too much love in my heart
To let the pain from these scars
Be the only thing I am
But I’m not gon pretend
It doesn’t hurt
Endings always hurt

I miss the touch of your hand
And the look in your eyes
And though I’m losing you
I know I must survive
No, I don’t regret everything we were
I truly hope you find the peace you’re looking for