Ok so here’s the thing. About a year ago I was minding my own business when

I became allergic to sunflower oil

You wouldn’t really think that would be a problem but

Sunflower oil is surprisingly in a lot of things

I became allergic to peanuts too but it hasn’t affected me as much

Ok so what happened is

Aliens took over my body and their DNA couldn’t handle the sunflowers because it’s their natural enemy

At least I think that’s what happened. I don’t really remember. Aliens and all. Ok actually the truth is one night I ate some peanut sauce and I woke up having an allergic reaction. I went all my life not allergic to peanuts. Suddenly I am. Ok so how does that translate to a sunflower allergy you ask. I’m glad you asked me that. I had to look it up. I looked it up on Google and it said

Aliens took over your body and their DNA can’t handle the sunflowers because it’s their natural enemy

Well that clears that up

It’s also in a lot of hygiene products. I’m not gonna tell you how I found that out

Use your imagination. I’m sure you’ll come up with something very interesting. Anyway. I have an epipen now. I have to be careful. I have to read ingredients on everything I buy. Which is fine. Reading is fundamental. I do know someday there will be a cure. NASA is working on it. Why NASA you ask. Well

Aliens take over your body and their DNA can’t handle the sunflowers because it’s their natural enemy

Yeah that’s why NASA. Gotta fight the aliens off. Duh.